Lost?

Are you lost? Walking alone on a train track of despair? Searching to fulfill a need inside you that you can not quite explain? A hunger, a thirst for more? Are you longing for your path to become clearer and less heavy? Feeling like you are missing something? Missing out? 

How do you know which way leads to fulfillment? Freedom? Contentment? 

Can someone like you even dare hope to get there? 

Listen in as Tammy Toney-Butler guides you to a Rock higher than yourself, a peace that surpasses all understanding, and a knowing, "This is the way; walk in it." 

Tammy is a lived experience expert whose unique teaching style and trauma-focused lens perspective offer the listener an environment conducive to healing mind, body, and spirit.

Tammy is outspoken in her mission to provide a trauma-responsive pulpit and compassionate, merciful lens through which one offers pastoral support. 

Join Tammy on the Reflective Hour Podcast and YouTube channel for healing support. https://reflectivehourwithtammytoneybutler.buzzsprout.com/

You can purchase her book on Amazon Kindle, "When you know, that you know, that you know there is a God." 

https://www.amazon.com/stores/Tammy-Toney-Butler/author/B0DC1VXP45?ref=ap_rdr&isDramIntegrated=true&shoppingPortalEnabled=true

Check out the ministry website at www.reflectivespacesministry.com

Click on the link to donate to further her reach and God's call on her life to minister to the sick, broken, hurting, and marginalized: 
https://www.paypal.com/fundraiser/charity/4406377

Hotline numbers: https://www.reflectivespacesministry.com/contact

About Tammy: https://www.reflectivespacesministry.com/about

References: Life Application Study Bible, NIV, Psalm 33.
Create the world you want to see by Kenneth W. Hagin, p. 67.

Buy Me A Coffee
Please buy me a cup of coffee to support my work. Donations are gifts and not tax deductible.

Cash App
Support our show with a gift that is not tax deductible.

Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase, I may receive a commission at no extra cost to you.

Transcript

Hello, welcome to today's episode of Reflective Hour with Tammy Toney-Butler. I'm your host, but we all know who the real host of this show is, and that's Christ. Holy Spirit, come have your way in this hour, in this time that we have together. It's only about you and not about me. Thank you for everyone that is tuning in and listening to this episode. We're so grateful, humbled, and honored to be able to come on and share the goodness, the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ. His peace that surpasses all understanding. His love for us, His sheep. even when we're lost and we don't know our way, which way to turn, how to free ourselves from that oppressive weight that we carry around day by day, longing for more, searching, knowing that there's something we need to do a path we need to take, a way we need to walk that will bring us to freedom, that will erase those negative thoughts, the heaviness, lift the despair and the depression, that threatens to consume us. Today's a difficult day for some. It brings reminders of loss and pain, suffering, questions as to why. Why would a glorious savior, a good God, have so much destruction? allow pain and loss? Those are difficult questions. Difficult answers. I lost my father to suicide when I was a teenager. We buried him on Father's Day. With every sound of the salute they had with him being a police officer. And I would hear the gun go off. I think it was . I can't remember. It would bring back to me that he had used a gun to harm himself. My father lost his battle with complex trauma in the aftermath of Vietnam. Came home wasn't the same. turned to alcohol to cope, turned inside of himself, and sadly ended his life. Many of you can feel overwhelmed, like you don't matter, like the world would be a better place without you. Those are lies. There's not one day Even now that I wish that my father had taken his life. No, I'm a little girl that always wanted her daddy. Didn't matter how messed up he was. He was my savior in so many ways. He was my dad and he was everything to a little girl. I didn't see his faults. In my walk with God as a survivor of child sex trafficking, loss of dad to suicide, adverse childhood experience, score of probably about a nine. I coped through addiction, so many things. In my walk with the Lord, I've learned to stop asking why. There are questions that have no answers. When you get to heaven, you can ask him. But you just have to let some stuff go. It's hard. It's difficult. But it only holds you into bondage. Keeps you from moving on and moving forward into who he's called you to be. I wasn't planning on doing reflective hour today. I'm getting ready to go out of town. I had things I had to do. But the Lord wanted me to come on because there's someone that needs to hear this. And even if the ninety-nine are safe, he goes after the one. I can't tell you how many times he sent me after the one. I'm obeying. I have no idea what he wants to talk about. He just said, go live. And I'm basically going to give you the words and the directions that you need to show them My light and my love. Because that's what this world needs. It needs love. It needs truth. It needs guidance. Just bask in his peace. That surpasses all understanding. His glory. That peace that you're feeling right now. That is not me. That's the Holy Spirit. Heaven is real. Jesus is real. There's something to this Christianity stuff. I've experienced it. He set me free of so many things. The shame, the guilt, the fear, the regret, the icky, the not wanting to get out of bed, pull the covers from my head, not ever feeling like I was good enough that I could measure up to this world's standards. I never really fit in, but I wasn't supposed to. I was set apart for his use and all that I went through, it wasn't for naught because he'll use it for good. Many of you will be set free just from feeling his presence now because it is thick and we are raw and real and vulnerable and and full of humility, and literally just laid out on the floor or crying or full of despair, He's right there ready to lift us up out of that pit. We just have to stretch out our hand for healing, focus on His goodness, His mercy, His truth, knowing that we're never too dirty to call out to Him for help. He won't leave us, forsake us. He won't reject us. Doesn't matter how many times in the past that you dug yourself out of that gutter and then went right back in the pit. Chose that path. Maybe said yes to a relationship you shouldn't have. Maybe you lost your sobriety for a few days. And now you're saying, hmm, Do I keep going down this road or do I dare crawl back to my Savior? Will He even let me come back? I'm so dirty and shameful. Some of the things I've done, said, the people I've hurt, choices I made. Will He even forgive me? Yes, he will. He's waiting on you to come back to say, Lord Jesus, I missed it. Oh, I messed up bad and I missed it. I said some things I shouldn't, did some things I shouldn't. I missed it. I may not even know all I did, but I know I did something. I'm just going to repent. I'm going to turn back to you and I'm going to choose you cuss you rescue those who need you you died on the cross so I could live an abundant free life you don't hold sin against me wash me clean you don't even remember it I can seek you I can seek you he is there and he is waiting you just have to turn towards him Go to a meeting. Go to a counseling session. Maybe put down that bottle of pills that you were thinking about doing something with because you know that's not going to end well. There is a crisis line, suicide crisis line, hotline, many avenues of help. All the hotline information and numbers will be in this at the end or in the show notes. And it's also on our website, reflective spaces, ministry.com. There's no shame in getting help, but don't continue to stay in the dark. Don't go down that road, drink another bottle, mix another drink, take another hit. It's not going to end well. He's your redeemer. He restored me. Come on. I mean, I'm nothing but filthy rags and the things I've done. Sometimes, well, he doesn't like me to say those things, but for a long time, I didn't feel worthy enough for him to even channel his energy through me and be a conduit for his love and mercy and grace. Because I thought, look how much I've sinned. What do I have to offer these people? But that's when he does his greatest work. And we're so raw and real and humble. Realizing we missed it. We're not perfect. Nobody is. Come on. Jesus, he's God. If you were perfect, you'd be God. I heard that said by an individual that I follow and his sermons and teachings. It kind of hit home how many times that I tried to play God in my own life, put myself on the throne. My way is the best way. Boy, I had pride. I had ego things I had to get rid of. I had a lot of junk in my trunk that Lord Jesus helped get rid of. He's literally whispering to me right now, I want you to come back to me. I want you to come back to me. I want you to say no to where you were going tonight. I don't want you to go to that party. I want you to stay home. I want you to choose me. Christ feels our infirmities, our hurts. I mean, he died for us. We're his bride. He loves us. He longs to be with us. I know when I was a little girl going through horrible things and I'd beg him to save me, I didn't get saved. I know he was with me though. I know he was because I endured. I endured. My mother made choices that put me in harm's way based on her own trauma. My father had his trauma. Don't let that destroy you. and your future, and your family. They need you. They want you. You are not worthless. You are not worthless, and you have a mighty call on your life. My heart is aching right now because I don't know who this is for, but I just feel the Holy Spirit saying, don't, don't go down that road. Please don't. Please come back to me. All those of you who are lost, come back to me. That's what he's saying in this hour. He wants you to know the freedom that he brings. Sure, I still have days I walk through storms in life, but he's delivered me from so much. And it's his strength that I get through every day. Come on, we live in a dark world. There's mass shootings. There's all this stuff. But you don't have to go through it in your own strength. You don't. You get to do it in his strength. In his strength. How powerful is that? We don't have a savior, a Lord, a God that's not approachable. I mean, I talked to him like I talked to you and I'm like, you know, I missed it. I think I did. I don't even know. I think I missed it. I might not have missed it. Was that appropriate? I mean, even now I have to say, and even ask my husband sometimes is, can I say no to this? Can I not do this? Is this okay? I mean, I didn't know what was good or bad. I grew up in trauma. I was cultivated in a womb of trauma. I was victimized from As young as I can remember onward, even into adulthood, I didn't know what right looked like. I didn't know what I could say no to. I didn't know how to set boundaries. I didn't know any of those things. But God showed me his goodness and his grace and his mercy and his love. He was there for me. He's there for you. He wants you to reach out and to come to him. And I read something in a book that he wanted me to read. I turned the page to it today under his direction. I want to give him credit. Create the World You Want to See by Kenneth W. Hagan. You know, read my Bible. correspondence school really helped me in so many ways because I didn't set out on this mission to be this spokesperson for God. I just happened to be a little girl that he set free and took it away and made me whole again. And he used what the devil meant for evil for good. And one moment in his presence changes everything. And I was one way and now I'm different. And I owe him my life. I owe him everything. And one thing that I found was the Holy Spirit has taught me. I mean, he's taught me out in the pasture, you know, in the field. And he shows me things and things. And then he shows me scriptures to back it up. And I didn't understand some of the things I was doing or why I was doing it a certain way. And then when I read a lot of Kenneth Hagin's books and some other individuals through that ministry, I really learned, oh, that's why I did that. Or that's why I said those things. Or that's why I went this way. Oh, that's why God had me do that. Oh, that makes sense. The Holy Spirit was teaching me and he'll teach you and guide you. He just wants you to call out to him for help. And anyway, I was reading, just create the world you want to see, Kenneth W. Hagen. Turn to page sixty seven. And it just stuck out to me and I have to read it to you. It said David affected his situation. God has a destiny for our lives, both corporately and individually. The enemy sends storms to try to keep us from fulfilling our destinies. He sends winds, waves, whatever he can come up with to try to stop us. The New Testament gives us an account of the disciples in a boat, which they thought was going to go down in the winds and waves. But then they looked up and saw Jesus walking toward them on the very same waves they thought were going to destroy them. Matthew, fourteen, twenty two to twenty seven for reference. Instead of being overtaken and overwhelmed by the waves of negative circumstances that come our way, we need to walk on top of them like Jesus did and like David eventually learned to do. God created us to be rainers, not runners, and he will empower us to reign in life. Again, giving credit to create the world you want to see by Kenneth W. Hagin. How powerful is that? That's powerful. We get to reign, reign over our circumstances. Many of us, we can't control where we live. We can't control our government. We can't control certain things are just out of our control. But what we can control is how we respond to adversity and how it affects us. We can choose joy. We can choose to walk a purposeful life in His strength, in His power. We can choose to see the good in things instead of looking at the bad. It's all about perspective and the lens at which you see through. See others through. I see people through the lens of trauma and recognizing that everybody I encounter is carrying around their own bag of rocks or these heavy weights that they don't let anybody know about. And they're doing life with them. Maybe they've suffered a loss of a child. Maybe they've been assaulted as a child. Maybe they've been traumatized in a war zone in some capacity of some kind. They all are carrying around their own stories. So I try to look at them as I look at myself and know that I was messed up and Lord Jesus saw fit to set me free, help me. He showed me the way, gave me a choice. Remember, you get to choose to follow Jesus, to have faith, that's free will. If it's forced upon you, that's manipulation and control. And that's not our savior. That's not Lord Jesus. He's the God of love and peace and mercy and guidance. He's your compass. He's your guide. Bask in his glory. Know that he sees you in your infirmary. That he has a plan. and a purpose for your life, that you matter, that you're worth so much. He loves you. I love you. You will be okay. You will get through this. You will pull yourself up out of that pit you're in and walk in the light. I know it. I know it because his word never returns void. And he sees you and meets you where you are. He's so good. I'm going to read Proverbs. I believe Proverbs. Nineteen. Let me look at it now. I want to make sure I'm reading. what he wants me to read. I'm just flipping through looking now. Just looking at his promises and his goodness. He laid on me several scriptures. So I just want to make sure of the one that I want to give you. And I'm actually in Proverbs and I think it was Psalm thirty three that really spoke to me. So forgive me because like I said, this is live and this is what he wants. And the more raw and real that I am and that I'm really relying on him, that's when he does his great work. So let's see. I believe this is the one I want to read. Because Psalm thirty three, because God is creator, Lord, savior, deliverer. He is worthy of our trust and praise. Because he is faithful and his word is dependable, we can rejoice and sing, giving thanks and praise. I'm reading out of the New International Version of the Life Application Study Bible. Sing joyfully to the Lord, you righteous. It is fitting for the upright to praise him. Praise the Lord with the heart. Make music to him on the ten-string lyre. I don't think I said that right. Sing to him a new song. Play skillfully and shout for joy. For the word of the Lord is right and true. He is faithful in all he does. The Lord loves righteousness and justice. The earth is full of his unfailing love. By the word of the Lord were the heavens made, their starry host by the breath of his mouth. He gathers the waters of the sea into jars. He puts the deep into storehouses. Let all the earth fear the Lord. Let all the people of the world revere him. For he spoke and it came to be. He commanded and it stood firm. The Lord foils the plans of the nations. He thwarts the purposes of the peoples, but the plans of the Lord stand firm forever. The purposes of his heart through all generations. Blessed is the nation whose God is the Lord, the people he chose for his inheritance. From heaven the Lord looks down and sees all mankind. From his dwelling place he watches all who live on earth. He who forms the hearts of all, who considers everything they do. No king is saved by the sides of his army. No warrior escapes by his great strength. A horse is a vain hope for deliverance. Despite all its great strength, it cannot save. But the eyes of the Lord are on those who fear him. on those whose hope is in his unfailing love, to deliver them from death and keep them alive in famine. We wait and hope for the Lord. He is our help and our shield. In him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in his holy name. May your unfailing love rest upon us, O Lord, even as we put our hope in you. Put your hope. in the lord he's going to carry you through the darkness he's going to show you the way light your path direct your steps I'm living proof go back and watch reflective hour with tammy tony butler go back to season one episode one start with my testimony his testimony and just keep watching the different episodes because Christ did all those, the Holy Spirit. And I just, he just flowed through me and I spoke his words of truth and there's truth for everybody in there. I mean, I had to go back and listen to him and I, there's things that helped me. And he's got help and healing in his wings. We just have to seek safety in the cleft of the rock under his wing, his protection. Humble ourself. Seek his will for our life and not our own. Surrender to his will for our lives and not what we think we need to be doing. Holy Spirit, have your way with this prayer as I close this out. What is it you want to say to all those that are watching, Father? You had me come on here. Help me to speak your truth, to pray as you'd had me pray. May they see you and not me. May they feel your presence and know that that is what it feels like to be in the presence of the Lord. A humbling experience that delivers even the most oppressed individual and sets them free. May you be set free, delivered from sickness, adversity, pain, and addiction. May he set you free today. In the powerful name of Lord Jesus, I declare freedom for those who listen to this, who seek him, his love, his deliverance, his glory. I think that's all he has for you today. This is what he wanted, his direction. I merely obeyed. God bless you and keep you and strengthen you and your families and be with you during this time and this season in your life. May the spiritual famine and drought be over and you experience an abundance of his love, mercy, his blessings. and have a transformed life that He wants you to have. It starts today. It starts by believing this word, reaching out for help, and letting Lord Jesus Christ be Lord and Savior of your life, surrendering to His will for your life and not your own, making Him Lord and Savior of your heart, and asking the Holy Spirit, His Spirit, to come live inside of you and change you from the inside. Help you to have the heart of Christ and the mind of Christ. Repent of your sins. You may not remember them all. I don't. I just repent and say, forgive me. He knows we've missed it. He offers forgiveness. We just have to accept him as Lord and Savior. Lord and Savior of our life. Knowing that he died on the cross for our sins, rose again, ascended to the right side of the Father, fully man, fully God, the Son of God, saying, Lord Jesus, no longer will my way work. It's not going to work. It's not been working. I'm not living. I'm existing. And I want to live life abundantly in fullness. Come into my heart, Lord Jesus. Make me a new creature. Be Lord and Savior of my life. Holy Spirit, come. Live inside of me. Give me a fresh feeling of your Holy Spirit. Maybe you've missed it in the past. Maybe you've fallen away and you're coming back. Give them fresh oil, Father. Fresh fullness of your Spirit. Thank you, Father. Thank you for showing them you, your love that heals and redeems all. Thank you. Thank you for allowing me to come on and share your goodness with those you love the most, your people, your bride, your church. Thank you, everyone. Have a blessed day. Thank you, everybody, for listening. I see you. You're listening in from Pakistan, from all over the world. God bless you and keep you. I see you. He sees you. Thank you all so much for listening. God bless you. God bless you and keep you. In the name of Jesus. Amen.